Every End Means a New Beginning
by alexsblackrose
Summary: One action without prior thought can create a domino effect that two boys are unprepared for. Will they embrace what their actions have set in motion? Set in Half-blood Prince
1. And with a word, it begins

"Sectumsempra!" He shouted as he flicked his wrist towards Malfoy.

A flash of white lashed like a whip from Harry's wand towards Malfoy. The pure white was soon overridden by splatters of red. His robes were in tatters and deep wounds appeared along his face and chest. He fell to his knees choking on the blood running down his throat. Harry ran towards his, a wordless cry on his lips, and fell to the floor next to him. He issued a gentler cutting charm against Malfoy's robes and pulled them away from the wounds.

He racked his brain for some spell, some charm to stop the bleeding. He struggled to remember anything else written down by the curse in his Potion's book or any possible cure from his lessons. Finally, the words broke free of the panic-filled fog that has descended on his brain.

"Vulnera Sanentur." He whispered the words hopefully.

He watched in anticipation as the blood flow ceased but the wounds remained open. He muttered it once more, relief at the cessation of the blood but fear for Malfoy's life crashing over him. The wounds started to scab and knit together. He laid his head on Malfoy's chest desperately listening for a heartbeat. It thudded faintly. He whispered the spell once more against his skin. The wounds finally healed over, his heartbeat grew louder and he started breathing heavily.

"Thank god!" He stayed laying against Malfoy, letting everything hit him. He hadn't meant to hurt him, let alone kill him. The fear and guilt at what he had done and the thought of losing Malfoy nearly consumed him. Tears pricked his eyes and he soon succumbed to the hysteria welling up inside him. Amidst his sobbing, he felt a stir beneath him. He felt a hand move up his leg, across his hip and settle on his back.

"P-p-otter?" Malfoy's hoarse voice broke through.

"Malfoy, oh my god! I'm so sorry. I didn't know the spell did that! I never would have used it!" Harry stopped resisting the urge and gathered Malfoy to him. He stopped at the whimper.

"Where the fuck did you learn that spell? I feel like I've been trampled by a hippogriph." He braced his hand on Harry and dragged himself up right. He was in too much pain to think about killing Potter.

"I found it in a book... I'm so sorry." He resisted dragging Malfoy to him once more and hung his head in shame.

"Potter, I'm in too much pain to hate you right now. Even though you did try to kill me, I owe you my life for knowing how to save me." He looked up at Potter and winced at the movement.

"But if it wasn't for me, I wouldn't have had to heal you. And the scars Dra…Malfoy. They're bad."

"I can fix those no problem if I can get to my room. No one needs to know about this." He grimaced as he tried to get up and fell back with a gasp. "On second thought, I don't think my room is the best idea. I need to get to the room of requirement."

"Here, let me help you up." Harry stood quickly and held out his hand. Malfoy stared in a moment of uncertainty. A range of emotions crossed his face before he finally gave in and accepted the hand. Harry hefted him up and put Malfoy's arm around his shoulder. Malfoy stood panting for a second before nodding that he could continue. Harry pulled his invisibility cloak out of the bag at his side and wrapped it around them both. They shuffled their way through the back halls until they reached the room.

Malfoy drew himself away from Harry and paced a few times in front of a blank wall before it transformed itself into a door. He allowed himself to be braced against Harry once more as they made their way to the door. Harry opened it to what appeared to be a den. There was a roaring fire in front of a dark leather couch and two chairs of the same material. Bookshelves lined a majority of the walls. On one blank wall, there was a cabinet containing vials and potions ingredients. On the opposite side was a large bed with black satin sheets and a blood red comforter.

"Bed or couch?" Harry asked tentatively.

"Neither. I have to go to the cabinet first." Malfoy directed them towards it and they slowly made their way over to it. He removed his arm from around Harry and searched the cabinet quickly. He brought out a large, pleasant smelling jar. "I fear I'll need help applying this." He flushed with embarrassment.

Harry nodded and brought him over to the couch. Malfoy gingerly removed his robes, staring down at his chest. A dozen still pink scars littered his chest, spreading up his neck, and there was a spattering across his face. Malfoy turned his face away from both his chest and Harry. Harry unscrewed the cap on the jar and scooped out some of the lotion. He used his other hand to take a little off and apply it to Malfoy's chest. He hissed but held still. He moved his ministrations to his neck. When he had finished with his chest and neck, he took a deep breath and put his hand on Malfoy's face and gently brought his face forward. He felt the other boy tense and bit his lip.

"I just need to get your face." He whispered. Malfoy nodded and he grabbed a little more of the salve. As he applied it to his face, he thought how best to say what was on his mind. "I'm so sorry, Draco. I never meant for this to happen." He watched as the scars started to fade.

"It's my fault. I was going to use one of the Unforgivables. If I was in your place, I would have let me die. It's no less than I deserve after all that's happened." To his shame, his eyes started welling with tears again.

"You know I couldn't do that. Who would I get into daily fights with then?" His joke fell flat and he softened. "Draco, you have a choice you know. You don't have to keep doing this."

"I'm not like you, Potter. I don't have the luxury or choice." His voice held bitter shame.

"We all have a choice. I know the threat you are living under. I know the fear you're feeling. We can keep this a secret until we're ready but you don't have to continue with all of this."

"H-harry," He stumbled over actually using his first name, "I just don't know what to do." And against everyone else in his life's voice screaming in his head, he allowed to Golden Boy to draw him in and hug him.

"It'll be ok. You don't have to be the bad guy. That's the great thing about having free will. You have the option to decide if who's side you want to be on, what you want to do with your life. I'm willing to help if you decide you want to be a part of our side."

"I think…I think I want to be good. I can't stand it anymore. I didn't want any of this to begin with. I think I want to start over…Starting with you, Harry."

"That's ok with me." He smiled warmly. "Though, I think it's better if we keep all of this away from everyone else until we have it all figured out. I don't think anyone else would understand." They both laughed nervously before settling back against each other.

They both became lost in their own thoughts, both thinking how easy it was to give up all the fighting and how easy they were in each other's company. Malfoy thought of the librated feeling swelling inside him. No more thoughts of how he was going to kill Dumbledore, fear of what would happen if he failed, or having to hide away from everyone. Harry thought of what all this could possibly mean. Malfoy had effectively switched sides and he wondered how to redirect all the energy he had spent going after him. They both thought about how everything begins with an end.

A/N: Ahhhh! I'm so sorry! I had to update this because I made a crucial error. Probably unnoticed by anyone but me, but I couldn't just leave it. Malfoy was supposed to kill Dumbledore, not Harry. But! It's all fixed now and I can sleep better at night.


	2. And with a few words, thoughts stir

They stayed there, just enjoying the solitude, for another couple hours before deciding to leave. They stood at the door, both wondering how to approach this goodbye. The events and closeness they had just experienced deemed a handshake too informal, yet a hug seemed too intimate. Malfoy finally stuck out his hand. Harry gave him one of his own and they smiled at each other.

"Why don't…" Harry hesitated, obviously lost in his thoughts, "I mean, we can't exactly talk in front of everyone else. How about we meet here once in awhile, just to keep this up?" He looked hopeful.

"I think it would work. Sunday morning after breakfast?"

Harry nodded and they both left. Harry headed down to the kitchens since they had missed dinner. He begged a plate from one of the house elves and watched them while he ate it. His thoughts were consumed with how he would break the news about the end of his and Malfoy's feud to his friends. They had been feuding since they had first arrived and the mere idea that it could be over in just one incident would be too much for his friends to handle. He handed his plate back to the elf, thanked him and made his way back to his common area. He waved his friends concerns away and went straight to bed.

It took Malfoy a little longer than normal to get back to his common area. Even after the healing spell and the salve, he was still ginger from the spell's effects. He waved away his friend's concerns and straightened his spine. He made himself walk as normal as possible up to his room before succumbing to the pain. He changed into his pajamas and lay in bed. He tried to fall asleep but it eluded him. Thoughts of the raven haired boy filled his head. His attempts to befriend him had finally succeeded and with that friendship came liberation from all the hardship he knew he would have to face if he continued on the path he was forced to walk. Even though he had often insisted so, he never hated Potter. The hurt and confusion over the rejection in their first year had caused him to make stupid decisions in an effort to pretend that it hadn't affected him at all.

And then the Dark Lord had come back. Threats towards everyone he loved had caused him to accept the one mission he never wanted in the first place. His father had lost favor with the Dark Lord and his life hung by a thread. If he wanted the ones he loved to live, he would have to kill the one person who had kept his hopes alive. Despite all his attempts to dissuade him, Dumbledore continued his efforts to try to bring Draco to his side. He frequently brought him in for one-on-one heart to hearts, discussing how things were at home, whether he was getting along well at school, how he was feeling. Despite how rotten he had been, Dumbledore thought he could be redeemed. The mere thought of having to kill the man who he looked up to and respected nauseated Draco and was one small piece of what caused his decision to accept Harry's offer.

Thinking of that offer filled Draco with hope for the future. He couldn't deny that Harry had what it took to take down the Dark Lord. History was too damning to deny it and only fools denied the truth. Draco was no fool. He also wasn't going to deny what that offer meant for him. A freedom from the chains his family, the Dark Lord and even being in his House had put upon him, the chance to redeem himself for the horrendous acts that he had already done, the choice to decide what his future could be, and the chance to become who he wanted to be and not what everyone else expected to be. In the enclosed quarters of his bed, Draco broke free of the disguise that he had placed upon himself. The cold, emotionless, dark mask that being a Malfoy and Death Eater required of him was slowly removed. The parts of him that he kept locked away slowly came forward to replace it. For the first time in a long time, Draco smiled with genuine happiness.

The next morning, the boys sat at their respective tables and fought the urge to look at each other. Each time they caught the other staring, they smiled quickly and immediately looked away. Both found it difficult to focus on what was going on when they were lost in their own thoughts of each other.

"Harry, you've barely touched your breakfast. You'll make yourself sick if you don't eat." Hermione placed her hand on his arm.

"Sorry, Mom. Just a little distracted this morning." He smiled at her and took a large bite of his eggs for effect.

"I'm not being a mom." She sputtered a little flustered. "What has you so distracted anyways?"

"Just thinking about life. How one decision can affect someone's entire life. What it means to forgive and what it takes for it to happen. How our choices affect everyone else around us."

Ron looked up from his meal in shock. "That's some deep thinking, Harry. What made you start?"

"Start thinking?" Harry laughed. "I've always thought. You just never asked what I was thinking about."

"I guess that's true. But we're Gryffindors. We're doers not thinkers."

"Why can't we be both? Hermione is a thinker and she's in Gryffindor as well. I get that all our Houses have our separate qualities that we are known for but have you thought that maybe there's more to us than just those qualities? We all have qualities of the different Houses but the Sorting Hat put us in the Houses that we are most like. We don't intermingle much either. So how are we to know that a Slytherin isn't compassionate and brave? How do we know that a Ravenclaw isn't passionate or that they can't act before they think? And how about us Gryffindors? Hermione is booksmart, like the Ravenclaws, she can be sly and cunning like a Slytherin, and she cares deeply about her friends and family like a Hufflepuff. But it's her willpower, her determination to fight for what's right, her fearlessness and her bravery that makes her a Gryffindor." He looked at Hermione who was deep in thought and nodding in agreement. "We're no different than everyone else here except that the Sorting Hat saw a little more of one quality in us than another. Even those who are in Slytherin. They value their friends and are willing to fight for them. Some of the value knowledge as much as even Hermione does. Yes, some of them side with He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named but they do it with the same single-minded determination in which our side follows Dumbledore and I. Just think about that."

He took a deep breath after the unintended speech and returned to his food. Somewhere in the middle of it, more than just his two best friends decided to listen in and caused everyone around him to take a good hard look at the other tables. Breakfast that morning gave more than just food for their bodies; it gave them food for thought. Harry decided to sneak a glance at Draco and he found him staring at him intently. He smiled quickly. His appetite came back with a vengeance and as he was eating he though Sunday just couldn't get there soon enough. There was so much he wanted to talk to Draco about.


	3. And with a sentence, change begins

Breakfast Sunday morning help excitement for everyone. The Ravenclaws had challenged the Hufflepuffs to a friendly Quidditch match because they hadn't faced each other in awhile. Harry and Draco were excited for the chance to work on their friendship. As everyone was eating and chatting happily, the owls carrying the daily mail started to arrive. The Weasley's, Hermione, and Harry all received packages from Mrs. Weasley containing sweets and letters. Harry and Ron eagerly opened their packages arguing over what to eat first while Hermione scolded them to not eat sweets before finishing their breakfast.

Harry sneaked a peek at Draco, only to see him hunched over a letter with his customary scowl etched in his face. He stared at the offensive letter as if he were trying to set it on fire with sheer power of will and it made Harry curious as to who it was from. He idly munched on a cookie from his package and half-listened to Ron and Hermione arguing over who would win in the upcoming Quidditch battle. He had no intentions of watching the match. He knew he'd have to come up with some excuse as to why, especially with his love of the game, that no one would question.

"Hey guys, I don't think I'm going to the Quidditch match." He continued to casually eat his breakfast.

"Why not, mate? Thought we were going to watch the Ravenclaws kick ass?" Ron looked at Harry as if he'd grown a second, maybe third, head.

"I still haven't finished my Potion's essay and I thought I'd get that done and spend some time studying."

"I could stay and help you, Harry. I know you were having issues with it and I already have it done."

"No thanks, Hermione. You go ahead and enjoy the game. I'm sure I can muddle through it on my own. If you want, if I have it done after the game you can go through it for me."

"Alright, if you're sure." Both Ron and Hermione gave him a weird look before continuing their discussion on who was going to win the match.

Harry started feeling antsy so after a quick glance at Draco and a goodbye to his friends, he headed up to his room. He knew Draco would still be awhile at breakfast so he grabbed his homework and headed down to the Room of Requirement. He had been ordered to write an essay on making the Dogbreath potion after he accidentally added the Fire Seeds too early and caused the cauldron to explode. The work was tedious and he sorely wished he had let Hermione help him with it. He was busy explaining the shade difference in the potion and how that connected with when he was supposed to add the seeds when Draco entered the room. Harry looked up completely confused.

"What's the difference between sky blue and light blue? Isn't the sky light blue?" He honestly looked a little panicked.

"Sky blue is two shades lighter than light blue. Doing your potion's essay?"

"Yeah, I know what I did wrong. I don't see why I have to evaluate and pick apart every little thing I did is silly."

"Then why is it so hard to write? Seems it'd be a breeze if you already have the answers."

"I don't know. Anyways, enough about my nonsense. What was with the letter at breakfast?" At his mention, Draco closed off and became distant.

"Just a letter from my father." His voice was tight.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"What will talking about it do, Potter? It is what it is." His jaw tensed and he avoided looking at Harry.

"If something is bothering you, talking about it can make you feel better. They can help you figure out how to go about fixing things. That's what friends are for."

"Friends." He scoffed. "It's not that simple. What can you do to help against what I'm facing? My father, my mother, you-know-who, the mission I'm forced to undertake? How do you, of all people, intend to help me?" Draco's sneer was back.

"There's no need to get defensive. I'm just trying to help. You don't have to be alone."

"And what do you know about being alone? You have everyone around you to support you. At any point in time, you can go to anyone. I've have no one, I've never had anyone. And before you even mention my "friends" in Slytherin, remember that they are all on the side of You-Know-Who. They would think me a fool if I told them I wanted out, that I didn't want any of this, that I didn't want to…" He stopped and took a breath, composing himself.

"You didn't want to what?" He asked gently.

"I can't…I can't talk about it. They'd kill me if I told, if I didn't do it."

"Just tell me. You're more of a fool than I thought if you don't think you can trust me right now." Draco still looked quite uncertain.

"My mission…" Harry let him take his time. "I'm supposed to kill Dumbledore. That's what the letter was about. He's putting pressure on my father because I haven't done it yet. The longer I wait, the more likely it is that he will kill my family." Draco dropped his head to his hands.

"Wait, he trusts you to kill Dumbledore? Isn't he worried you'll be caught or killed?"

Draco laughed bitterly. "He expects it, I assume. I wouldn't put it past him to want me dead just to make his point stick with my family."

"And he would go that far, wouldn't he? You don't have to kill him, you know. He can help you. He won't hold your past decisions, your parent's decisions, or what you've been put up to against you. He's not like that." Harry rested his hand on Draco's arm.

"I still have more time. Can we just…wait?"

"I wouldn't take too much time. You don't know what can happen. There are some things you just can't leave to time and fate, especially not when it comes to life and death. The risk is just too great, especially for everyone close to you and those who depend on you."

"The only risk with my dying would be to me. I think the only people affected by it would be my mother and maybe Pansy, Crabbe, and Goyle. We Slytherins aren't known for having close relationships, being self-centered and only out for ourselves of course."

Harry thought awhile before asking his next question. "What about your father?"

Draco slowly turned in the are-you-serious manner and stared at Harry. "Are you really going to ask me that when you know my father? All he cares about is maintaining the family name, keeping in good favor with the Dark Lord, and guaranteeing with stay in favor with the Ministry. If I die, it will be a tragic accident and a smaller smirch on our name than if I wouldn't do kill him. If I manage to do it, our family will rise quite quickly in favor. But that's not to say he won't soon ruin us once again. My father's ambitions for both the Ministry and the Dark Lord don't tend to mesh well."

"Well considering they are both on opposite sides of this war, I would think not." Harry tried to keep a straight face and was rewarded with a scowl.

"Oh, I never would have guessed, smart ass. I thought they were hand in hand." Draco nervously tapped his hands against his leg.

"Well, if you think about it, they do have something in common. They both want to keep someone out of our world. Voldemort wants to keep Muggleborns and half-bloods out and the Ministry wants to keep Death Eaters and Voldemort out. They will also do absolutely anything to get what they want, no matter who they hurt. The Ministry may say it's all for the Greater Good, but look at what happened in the Triwizard Tournament? They were willing to let the 4 of us die to save face. Cedric did die." He saw Draco wince and mildly regretted his statement. "Or with Sirius. They were willing to give the Dememtor's Kiss to an innocent man because they did not want to admit that they had been wrong or that they had been proven wrong by a child. Last year, they didn't want to admit that Voldemort was back because it didn't fit in with their plans. I was nearly expelled, Sirius is dead, they foisted Umbridge on us, and the 6 of us were nearly killed by Death Eaters at the Ministry." Once again, Draco had a pained look upon his face.

"I don't blame you for what your father has done. I would never hold the sins of the father against the son. The only thing you are responsible for is your own actions and you've already said that you want to be done with it all. That's enough for me." Harry smiled at him.

"Can we switch subjects? I can't deal with much more of this." Harry rubbed his arm and they started talking about all sorts of nonsense from the antics of their housemates to their classes. Draco helped him with his Potion's essay and he helped him with Draco with Charms. The tone was shockingly easygoing and the time passed by easily. Soon, it was time for them to head to their respective common rooms and see who won the Quidditch match. Harry peeked out the door to make sure there was no one there and they both headed out. They tossed a wave over their shoulder and continued on, both lost in their thoughts. Harry entered his common room, saw Hermione and handed her his Potion's homework.

"I think you'll find this is all in order. I think I can make the potion tomorrow without the same screw up."

"Can you make it without other screw ups?" Hermione teased him gently while looking over the paper.

"I can't make any guarantees on that part." He laughed.

"Well, it seems to be okay. Do you get the difference between sky blue and light blue now?"

"Sky blue is two shades lighter than light blue! Though, I still don't think it makes much of a difference. Blue is blue."

"Spoken like a true guy." She giggled. "There's a complete difference!"

"I know the difference between sky blue and light blue." Ron muttered from beside her.

"That's because it's been drilled into your head by Snape, silly. Harry, however, seems to have been having other things on his mind in Potions. You've been distracted a lot lately. Do you want to talk about it?" Hermione handed him back his homework.

"Not really. Nothing's going on really. Just lots of things are going on and parts of me just don't know what's really going on. Just trying to sort it all out. So how'd the game go, by the way?" Both Ron and Hermione noticed the subject change but let it go.

"Ravenclaws won by just a snitch catch." Ron said smugly.

The two of them descended into a play by play of the game. Harry settled back against the couch and listened to them chatter. He added in his input here and there but his thoughts were caught up with Draco. Hearing everything that was going on with him certainly gave him a different view of him. The new perspective was shocking and unexpected but he found that he liked being able to see Draco as more of a human. He had been his enemy for so long that is was refreshing. He knew that Lucius was an asshole but he never knew that it was that bad. He wondered how Ron and Hermione would react to everything that was going on with them. He hoped he would be able to tell them soon but until then, he could sit back and enjoy everyone's company.

A/N: The length of the chapters will change. Right now, it's about when it feels right to end it. The way I feel, with Draco's snark comes a sense of comfortability. Right now, he's vulnerable and at odds with himself over Harry which doesn't make him very comfortable because he's not in control like he usually is. As you can see, it is coming out as he's getting more comfortable. It's not going away forever, so no worries dear. Same with the animosity. There will still be parts that they will fight over. I love their aggressive relationship as much as the next fangirl. And thank you, my lovely reviewer! Hope this calms your worries.


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